What is faith? Faith is rather nebulous word. Trust is, I think, a more accurate translation. Of course, trust in G-d is even more specific. And that is what I am asking…what is trust in G-d? Or perhaps it is better worded as what is trusting G-d?
(Inserting a heads up: I am not feeling that well so I did not proofread this. Please forgive any errors.)
This is something with which I wrestle and I am going to be bold enough (or foolish enough) to share some of my wrestling with you. I am putting two things in juxtaposition to one another, but there are not necessarily only two possibilities. In fact, if anyone can think of some other alternatives, please share them! I would love hear your thoughts.
Is trusting G-d when you look at your gas tank and your bank account and say, “OK, I guess I am in a season of my life when I am supposed to stay home out here in the sticks and not visit anyone or go anywhere and I am choosing to be OK with that”? Or is trusting G-d saying, “I am going to get out of the house and off the property and believe that G-d is going to somehow either multiply the gas or provide a means for us to buy more”?
Is trusting G-d looking at your woodpile and saying, “I had better keep the house cooler and be very careful to stretch my wood supply out”? Or is trusting G-d saying, “I will go ahead and keep the house warmer and believe that G-d is going to either bring us more wood, make sure the wood we can harvest is dry enough or provide the means to buy more wood”?
Is trusting G-d using Food Stamps? Or is it not using them even when you know your income barely covers bare minimum bills and gas to get to work? Adding another wrinkle: when using them means they won’t come after you for what they say you owe them back even though it is their mistake and not using them means you are fair game to however they choose to get their money back.
Is trusting G-d keeping your needs to yourself and believing that G-d will somehow either provide supernaturally or will put it on the hearts of His people to meet that need they do not know about? Or is trusting G-d sharing your needs because He most often chooses to work through His people?
Is trusting G-d tithing even when you know you cannot pay a bill on time and will incur a late fee (or when you know you will have to ask the assembly for monetary help either for gas or some other necessity)? Or is trusting G-d giving a smaller amount, being a good steward and witness by paying your bills on time and not incurring a late fee and believing that He will provide more when He is ready?
Is trusting in G-d believing that certain necessities are going to miraculously multiple or stop wearing out until that “someday” when more money comes in or will be provided in some other way? Or is it going ahead and buying the needed items and trusting that you can get to work in spite of the fact that you just spent gas money?
G-d wants us all to be givers. But in order to be givers, there must be recipients. In order to help the poor and those in need, there have to be poor and in need people. I liked it so much better when I was in a position to give. We still give whenever the Ruach puts it on our hearts and we just trust Him. However, we want to give so much more. We don’t really like being on the needy side, but we accept it. And then we wonder if we are just not stepping out in faith. Should we go ahead and buy those necessities? (This is especially difficult if those necessities are either undergarments or something you use a lot that is becoming unusable.)
These are thing I/we wrestle with. We work very hard to be good stewards. We do not smoke or drink or eat steak or other expensive foods. We do not have a monthly cell phone bill preferring to use a Tracfone for the bare minimum need of living out in the sticks. We do not have cable or satellite. We do have internet, but try job hunting without it or being isolated in the sticks without it. I make our meals from scratch, which is fine with me. I enjoy cooking and it is healthier.
My point is that we are not frivolous. We do everything we can to stretch a dollar. There really isn’t much cut back left available. We are limiting in every way possible our food budget to what Food Stamps provides. Our money goes to bills and gas and those non-food items like laundry detergent, etc. In fact, I would make my own laundry detergent since it is SO much cheaper, but we cannot afford all the initial supplies!
Yes, there are times when I/we are rather frustrated. But it all goes back to trusting our heavenly Abba/Father. You know…the One who cares for even the sparrows and has all the hairs on our head counted (or not counted, if you know what I mean). We are told in 1 Peter that we have been given everything pertaining to life and godliness. Either I believe that or I don’t. It is a choice.
Over the years, I have found my Creator to be very faithful. It has not always felt like it. There were (and still are) times when I struggled to separate true need from want. But I am here today which is a testimony to the fact that my most basic needs MUST have been met!
Here is a graphic from another blog that I think fits well. If I did this correctly, clicking on the graphic should take you to the blog it came from.