Dreams are good. Dreams can motivate us to try things we might not ordinarily try. They can encourage us to keep on going in the midst of obstacles. I believe everyone should have dreams of some sort.
There is a downside to dreams, however. Dreams can create unrealistic expectations, especially if those dreams involve other people or things that are simply beyond our control.
Take marriage, for instance. We can have dreams of marrying the “perfect” spouse. We can have dreams of “perfecting” the imperfect spouse we have. We can have dreams of what marriage with this person will be like and of what the future together holds.
How about moving? We can have dreams of what kind of house we will buy or rent in this new place. We can have dreams about what kind of neighborhood we will live in and what our neighbors will be like.
Financially? We can have dreams of how our future will go, what kind of vehicles we will have, what places we will visit, things we will do and experience. We can dream of the “perfect” job and financial “security”.
Family? We can dream of marrying into a wonderful family where we are loved and accepted. We can dream of freedom from a negative family if we can just get married. We can dream of having the exact amount of children we want and, of course, we always dream that they will turn out perfectly…successful in all good ways and always healthy.
Dreams of what it means to become a Christian…to walk with Yeshua/Jesus. We can dream that becoming a follower of Yeshua means that all our troubles will just melt away. We will become this wonderful person and our circumstances will always be joyful and peace filled. No financial troubles. No marital troubles. Nice, obedient children.
None of those dreams are bad things. If we don’t have dreams for good things, what will motivate us to do what IS in our power to make them happen? However, what happens if your dreams don’t, or can’t, come true? Are you prepared for that? Do you hold your dreams tightly? Or loosely? If you don’t get your dreams, does your whole world fall apart?
What happens if that imperfect spouse just won’t change into what you want him or her to be? What if they want to, but simply can’t? What if one of you becomes injured or sick…or even dies?
What if that good paying job or career disappears? What if the only job you can get you hate? What if you have to move and find that you cannot afford a house that is anything like what you have always wanted…or you have to live in a house that is much less than what you used to have…or even an apartment? What if you don’t even have a place to live? What if the only job you or your spouse can find takes them far away so that you can only see them once in a while?
What if the family you married into turns out to be very dysfunctional? Or if you find out that you can never please them? Or they simply do not like you? What if they won’t stop trying to interfere in your life? What if marriage, even into a wonderful family, does not remove the influence of the negative family in which you grew up?
What if your children decide that, in spite of all your efforts to raise them right, they are going to walk a different path…even a dark path? Or what if you cannot have the children for whom your heart aches? What is one, or even more, of your children gets hurt and/or dies?
What if someone gave you the wrong impression that all you need to do is “accept Jesus as your personal Saviour and all will go well with your life…you will have health and prosperity?” What if all you seem to be experiencing is trials and calamities? And, instead of getting better, life seems to be getting worse?
We can have a lot of dreams. Sometimes those dreams are realistic. Sometimes they are not. Sometimes we have been sold a bill of goods about what life as a spouse, as a parent as a Christian, as an employee in a particular career or for a particular company is to be like. Sometimes, we have been betrayed by someone who should have stuck by us. Sometimes, we have been led to believe that, if we just raise our children according to this or that formula, they will turn out well…only to find that we have done our best and they are choosing bad things anyway. What if your spouse decides they no longer want to be married to you?
I have learned in the course of my life that dreams are good things. However, I must hold them loosely. What if my dreams are simply not G-d’s will for my life? What if He has a different plan…a different path for me to walk? When my dreams do not come true, will I trust Him? Will I truly believe that He has my best interests at heart?
I believe that is where real faith comes in. Faith equals trust. Do I trust YHWH? Will I choose to trust Him even when I cannot see His plan for me? Will I trust even when life situations look very dark? That is the real question.
YHWH has a plan, even when I don’t see it. Thankfully, He has oftentimes given me glimpses of what is really going on “behind the scenes”…of what He is trying to accomplish in my life and/or the lives of others. I have learned to trust Him even when I cannot see a thing…even when life feels so dark that it is as if I cannot see my hand in front of my face.
Faith = Trust. I choose to trust.